Beginner's Series: Gym FAQs

I’m looking for a gym and don’t know which one to pick. Where should I go?

Click here for the full article on how to pick a gym.

If your neck of the woods has decent municipal rec centers, the gyms in those are usually good environments. (And don’t tend to be as sales oriented as the “big box” gyms). That is my main recommendation. Otherwise, check out everything within your budget- go there, tell them you’re thinking about buying a membership, and ask to have a quick look around.

What time is best to go?

The time you’ll most consistently go at. Peak hours tend to be the two hours after most people get off work; do with that information what you will.

The people are jerks and I don’t have the energy to deal with that, what do I do?

Try a different gym. If you’re going to a college gym, try literally anywhere else. If not, try a gym that doesn’t seem to cater to the same crowd.

Who do I ask for help if I don’t know what I’m doing?

At a high quality gym, all the staff will be knowledgeable. Ask the person at the front desk; they may be a trainer themselves, or they’ll know where one is. If you’re going to a place that likes to try and sell you stuff, be aware that they might try to sell you a training package. (But hey, maybe you’d like one.)

Should I talk to that person next to me?

If they don’t have headphones, go for it.

Should I hire a trainer? What should I look for?

You should, and the main quality you should look for in one is that they’re me.

Secondary to that, if your gym has trainers and you’re thinking of hiring one, do some quick googling for what the going rate for a qualified trainer is in your area, then compare that to what your local gym is offering.

If you don’t want to buy a billion sessions, most places/trainers offer rates for one-off assessments, “starter packs” of usually about three sessions, etc.

A good way to make use of a personal trainer with a relatively limited budget is to see them for a few sessions so they can set you up with a good program (a starter pack or similar deal is a good way to do this) and then see about setting up a session once every few months to check in on your progress.

Should I attend a group class?

If it looks like something you want to try, yes!

Should I submit a comment card at the gym that the staff work very hard and deserve a raise?

Yes!

How do I know I’ll actually use this membership?

By the power of the swole gods, I compel thee to go to the gym regularly until the fluorescent lights above the weight benches are imprinted into the back of your eyelids; until grip chalk and hand sanitizer permeates your pores; until the sound of slamming metal and whirring treadmills fades into white noise. And you shall become of the gym, as the gym shall become of you; it shall be your happy place after a long day of work, your solace after a breakup, your lifelong companion. The gym itself may change, but in every gym, the faithful exerciser finds themselves connected to the essence of the one great gym, the spirit gym, the transcendent interdimensional world-gym.